Aunt Biddy vs. Nana

Has anyone ever had someone in their life- well, I'm sure we all have- that we'll call "Aunt Biddy". The member of the family you will never please. Always has something to say about your weight, your clothes, your hair, your life decisions, your parenting decisions, etc. She's very passive aggressive in her comments about said things. No matter how hard you try- or don't try, whatever- she has all the answers. You hate to ask her a favor because she'll let you know, ever so slyly, that it's a burden to her.

I have enough Aunt Biddys in my life to count on a hand.

I often feel like the black sheep of my family... the one who didn't finish college. The one who married a guy she barely dated. The one who had an oops-of-a- "honeymoon" baby & now just keeps "oops" having babies. I let my kids run around barefoot & I let them climb on the furniture. I had "so much going for me" and now I'm "just" a young mom.

Some people in my family think I'm irresponsible. Or crazy. Or both.

Then there's Nana... I have a Nana I adopted as my own a few years ago, Nana Betty. No matter what she loves me. She loves my kids and is overjoyed with each pregnancy. She sees the Lord's hand in my life- whether or not I make decisions she doesn't agree with, I would never know because she doesn't let me know. She accepts who I am for what I am. And accepts that the Lord has plans for me. I know I could ask anything of her. In the same way my mom is Nana to my girls. Just loves them, and while she doesn't let them get away with anything at her house & sometimes they wear her out, she always welcomes them with open arms. My girls are the apple of her eye.

Everyone needs a Nana in their life.

I never realized how the attitudes of members in your family can really shape your perspective of God the Father. We often have a view of God as an "Aunt Biddy"... we dread going to Him to ask things of Him because we feel as if He is frowning on us. Disappointed in us because of (fill in the blank). We feel like we let Him down, so how could we go to Him? We picture Him saying, with a big sigh," Yes, I'll give you grace to deal with your children today.... IF you do better than you did yesterday." I often feel God is disappointed in me because of decisions I've made in my life & parenting. If only I would have...., then maybe..... The truth is, this isn't TRUTH!

God MY Father is not just another member of my family frowning over me because I didn't graduate from college.

In her book Give Them Grace, Elyse Fitzpatrick writes:

The Lord isn't disappointed in you or in your parenting. He's not disappointed in your prayers. He doesn't treat His dear children as "disappointments" whose disobedience and failures take Him by surprise or shock Him. He does not suspend His love until they get their acts back together. He already knows the worst about you (in yourself) and loves and approves of you nonetheless (in Christ). Although your sin does grieve Him (Eph 4:30), he doesn't want you to keep your distance, sitting in a corner wearing a dunce cap until you learn your lessons. He invites you to come boldly in with joy and confidence, knowing that He is eager to embrace you. You, as a sinner who trusts His Son, Jesus, are able to do that because the Son prays and intercedes for you. The Father loves you.

Our prayer times with the Lord need change from visits with Aunt Biddy to family dinners with (Nana).

I love this reminder. I need this reminder.

He is my all loving Father who longs to show me grace. He waits to show me grace (Is 30:18).

Nothing surprises Him.

I do have confidence in my decisions. In where the Lord has brought me, so quickly, from a careless college student to Mommy of three. There is nothing I would change about my life, not even for the approval of all!

I greatly desire so much more for my daughters than the approval of friends, family, or the world. I pray I can show them they only need to gain the approval of One, and that there is only One Way to gain such approval. I pray my life models this conviction... If the Lord is my Father and He leads and guides every decision I make- or Dustin & I make... then what else matters???

I'm gonna miss these days...

You know, those days where all you really want to do is take a shower?

.........and finally you get a moment.

Baby is sleeping.

Big sisters have a snack and are currently being entertained by Sesame Street.

conditions. are. perfect.

GO!

Then with a head full of shampoo, well, errr- baking soda- the door opens and you hear "Mommy. I have to go potty." You peek around the curtain and see your well potty trained-or-so-you-thought 3 1/2 yr old standing there in the hallway in a puddle of pee. You call her into the bathroom to undress & get a towel to go cover her pee while you *try to* finish quickly just as you hear them--- tiny toddler feet running down the hallway and....

Yes.

It happened.

There lies Catie-bug.

In Gabbi's pee.

...and suddenly, your peaceful 10mins alone

are crowded by two others in worse need of bathing.

They get in the shower & you hop out for towels to dry them up, and clothes to get them dressed when you hear the inevitable::: Baby starts crying. So it's a *how fast can I possibly get this done* race to at least get a diaper on Catie & panties on Gabbi.

Ok. Not so bad. No one was hurt or scarred- except maybe Mommy.

Feed Baby.

Get a phone call.

Relay to friend the chaos of the morning.

No sooner do you finish that story, when the 20 month old dumps Big Sister's milk from breakfast all in Baby's car seat.

:::sigh:::

I'm gonna miss these day.

So how has it been adjusting to three? Well, some days (like those listed above) I just gotta laugh to keep from crying.

An extra set of hands would be nice.

And it's amazing how just one more child can make your home seem a thousand times smaller... I find myself daydreaming of a bigger home. Ugh discontentment. I hate it.

Laundry stays piles for days at a time, and the bathroom goes longer than I'd care to admit without being cleaned. My house is a wreck, but it's not *dirty*. My kids are in PJs most of the day, but they're loved.

Yeah my hands may be full.... but so is my heart.

Day 12

Something I love.

There are a lot of obvious things that I love. I love Jesus & worshiping Him & the Gospel.

I thought about just doing something not-so-obvious.

I love cooking. I love Mexican food. I love celebrating birthdays. I love photography. I love road trips. ( I could go on.)

Then I decided against that.... so let's be obvious...

I absolutely love&adore this man. I love him more today than the day I married him. I love the man he is, and the man the Lord is growing him to be. He is amazing. I love the way he loves us, his girls. The greatest husband & father I know. I know most any wife would say that about their husband, and that's okay. He's mine... and no one else needs to think he's the greatest husband & father they know :)

I love our sweet girls, our growing family.

I am so thankful for what the Lord has given me in my little family. Some days are hard- we absolutely don't live in some fairy tale fantasy... but I love where we are. I know time is fleeting. Gabbi is 3 and it seems like just yesterday we were up all night with our screaming newborn. My time with them is precious... short. With Dustin too really, if you think about it. I want to redeem the time with them. I want to show Christ to my husband and my girls. Although I know I fail everyday, His grace is there. I love how forgiving children are. I can be short with Gabbi sometimes, and she is so quick to forgive when I apologize to her. She forgets. And she still loves me so much. I know I can learn something from that.

I love them all so much. And, at least for the next 15 years, we're together no matter what... or where... I wouldn't want it any other way.